Monday, October 27, 2014

I'm Fine!

I wish I knew how to pretend to be fine.  I can't!  I know it's a cliché, but I wear my emotions on my sleeve.  I am working on letting things go.  I have "Hope" that one day our dreams will come true. But pretending to be O.K. would be a lie to myself and everyone else.

Today, day 8 of stims, did not show much improvement from my last scan.  I cried.  I had such high hopes for this cycle, starting with a better AFC than my last cycle.  Maybe the U/S tech was wrong, maybe there were not antrial follicles on my Left Ovary. It really doesn't matter.  What matters is that I can get through the next few days without losing all hope.  That I do not let doubt overcome me.  I need to remember that being upset does not help the situation.  


One day this will all be a distant nightmare.  I will look back and I'll tell myself that every dollar, shot, bruise, heartache, and tears were all worth it!!  

3 comments:

  1. It will be a distant nightmare! You will get there my friend. I remember that feeling of hardly any growth. DOR is the worst! I'm sorry. Hoping you're just responding slowly. How are you doing on Menopur? I have a friend who just gave me a box and I don't need it anymore. Let me know if you run low.

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  2. Jessah, I am on menopur. Menopur is one med I have a good supply of. Thank you for offering!! And more than anything. Thank you so much for your support!!

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