Saturday, March 31, 2012

ET drama and a much needed update (long)

I have to first say I love my family!  My sister and her family moved 2 hrs away from LV.  I have seen her and her kids and her DH multiple times since I have been here for my IVF.  I actually went furniture shopping with her--it was painful, but it was fun spending time with her like the old days when we only lived miles apart.  I had forgotten how much I miss her company.

I am staying with my Aunt and her DH again.  I love that they make DH and I feel like we are at home!  I can only imagine how much money we are saving staying with family vs. a hotel/motel.  If my Aunt did not live in LV the closest family to LV would be my sister, the next closest is four hrs away--not that far of a drive, but gas prices are ridiculous!  Gas alone would break the bank. 

Lastly, I love, love, love seeing my cousins and their kids.  These specific cousins did not live in SLC when we were growing up, and I am finally a getting to know them and I am getting to know them well.

One of my cousin's graciously offered donating her eggs to us if this cycle does not work.  I feel that her offer is genuine and it is something DH and I would highly consider, she said she would commute to SL if we decided not to cycle in LV again.  I of course have reservations, especially because of my sister ED drama, but I am happy to have that as an option.

Now here is my ET drama.  We had two follicles, both eggs were retrieved; one was mature and fertilized normally with ICSI.  At first I was not sure if I should've been disappointed or grateful.  I went with grateful we only At this very moment I will go with grateful, because this has been better than my last two cycles. 

Well, the initial plan was to do a 5dt with Dr. Sher since my RE was going oot. Yesterday my RE called and said Dr. Sher had an emergency and will not be available to do our 5dt.  This caused a lot of unneeded stress on my end.  Dr. Fisch sold us on the 5dt, although we only have one embryo.  He explained that 5dt gives more information regarding a failed cycle, such as embryo issues, implantation, and/or immulogic issue.  I know that I want this information even/especially if we do not cycle with our own eggs again.  I would hate to throw more money toward IF treatments if there are other issues that need to be addressed.

Anyway, I was given the option to go in today for a 2dt or wait for a 5 day report, see if the embryo makes it to blast, freeze our embryo and do a FET later. There are pro's and cons to both situations; if we decided to do a FET we would risk our embryo not making it through a thaw.  If we decided to do a 2dt we would not know as much regarding our embryo and quality.  So we decided to do a fresh 2dt, went in and spoke with our RE he looked at our embryo--two cell (should be btwn two and four cells).  We were able to see a pic of our cute embryo.  He said that he and Dr. Sher worked out their schedules and there will be someone to do the transfer Tues.  I am so relieved, I feel so much better about having a 5dt!

I’m keeping my fingers crossed we have one amazing embryo!  I'm very nervous I am going home with an empty ute.  Please pray/send vibes my embryo makes it to transfer.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Happily Ever After?


One of my BFF's and I always joke about our Happily Ever Afters.  She has been determined to find a man, marry him on a beach while I am there as her Matron of honor, barefoot and pregnant.  Things are working out beautifully for her.  I am ecstatic she has met an amazing man, who treats her like a princess! 

It seems, on the other hand that I may not end up with my happily ever after.  My ultrasound on Monday showed three small follicles, I went in today for my second check and only one of those three has shown growth, but only a little growth. 

I will stim for a few more days and go in again on Sat. for u/s #3.  If the follicle grows I will have my retrieval on Thurs next week, if not I am canceled.  I'm at a loss.  I'm so tired of this rollercoaster.  Why can't I just get knocked the fuck up?  I haven’t done anything to deserve this.  Please pray/send vibes that I have strength to get through this, and I will also end up with my happily ever after. 



Friday, March 16, 2012

The planets and stars may not be perfectly aligned, but I'm feeling lucky :)





I caught a bug and I was super sick Wed. with a fever and achy body. I felt like shit balls. I went to the local urgent care, they suspect I have the flu, but did not test me for it since I was immunized early in the season he didn't feel tamaflu would be helpful. The MD felt it wasn't necessary to do any testing because he did not feel it was safe treating me with meds since I am stimming for IVF.

I was very annoyed! I spent all that money when I could have told myself the same info. The least they could have administered me a liter of IV fluid since I was dehydrated. I called my RE; they gave me the ok to take Tylenol cold and flu which was my life saver. I'm so happy that I’m a nurse with hook-up's. I was able to have a friend administer a liter of IV fluids. I'm so happy to report I’m on the mend now, and feeling much better.

All in time for my upcoming u/s this Monday. I have realized during myself imposed break that things will never be perfect. I may not be in perfect health. DH is getting laid off. My FIL has moved in because he is out of work. Yet I am very optimistic. I feel that even though the planets and stars are not aligned. Things in our life are not perfect; I'm in a good place mentally. DH and I are in an amazing place as a couple. Things just seem to be right. Which is the reason I know I'm going to be knocked the eff up with this IVF :)

Today "I got my nails did" to help celebrate. It doesn't hurt to have a little extra luck on my side either.




Monday, March 12, 2012

R.I.P Baby Bertha aka Bertha the Battle Cat



Last Thursday we had to put our sweet cat Bertha to sleep. DH liked to call her Bertha the Battle Cat.  I called her Baby Bertha. She lived for an amazing 19 years.

I love both of these pics. The Pic on the left she was attempting to reach her cat treats. The one on the right I was working on my bachelors in Nursing. I believe I was working on a paper in our home office and she was keeping me company!

We will miss her forever!